By Chris Vander Woude, Son of Tom Vander Woude

At halftime during an O’Gorman football game in 2010, Tom Vander Woude ‘60 was inducted into the O’Gorman-Cathedral Hall of Fame for Excellence in Service, but Tom was absent. Two years earlier, he had given his life to save his son. Now, the Diocese of Arlington, Virginia, could open my father’s cause for Canonization.

Dad was born in 1942 and grew up on a farm near Sioux Falls. He attended Cathedral and played both basketball and football. He joked that he played football just for the hot showers. Dad was a key player on the 1960 Cathedral State Championship team and earned All-State honors that year. During his junior year at a church bazaar, Dad won a raffle prize for a hair salon visit. Not needing it, he gave it to Mary Ellen Earley '62 and asked to walk her home. That marked the start of their 48-year relationship. After Dad graduated from Creighton University, they got married at St. Joseph’s Cathedral. Mom and Dad had seven sons, and I am the fifth.

Dad served our country for 16 years in the Navy, including as a Naval Aviator in the Tonkin Gulf. He then became a commercial airline pilot, retiring in 2002.

In 1984, we moved to Virginia to attend Seton School. At Seton, Dad was a jack-of-all-trades, coaching basketball and soccer, laying the basketball floor, building bleachers, hanging lights, and setting up the stage for musicals. He was known for his quiet generosity, co-signing loans for young families, and letting a family of 12 stay with us for a week while they searched for a new home.

Dad’s devotion to Mom was evident in the way he looked at and spoke to her. They were an unshakable team. They attended Mass and said the Rosary daily, and Dad would make a weekly holy hour from 2:00am–3:00am in the adoration chapel. Their spiritual unity was the foundation of their marriage.

Dad and Mom’s selfless love grew even stronger when my youngest brother, Joseph, was born with Down Syndrome. Doctors told my parents that crawling would aid Joseph’s development. Since it was difficult for Joseph, Dad spent hours crawling around the house with him. Joseph sat with Dad on the bench for most games Dad coached, and Dad even got him into some basketball games at Seton. Wherever Dad went, Joseph was there too. They were inseparable.

Dad’s final act for Joseph taught me a lesson I will never forget: real love is sacrificial.

On that fateful morning of September 8, 2008, Joseph fell into our farm’s septic tank when the cover collapsed, sending him into toxic sewage and gases. Dad called for help, jumped in, and started pushing Joseph up toward fresh air. A man working on the house ran over to help. Dad told him, “You pull, I’ll push.” Then the fumes overtook Dad, and he sank beneath Joseph. After calling 9-1-1, my mom came to help. She watched horrified, knowing Dad was trapped underneath. When the first responders arrived, they rescued Joseph and rushed him to the hospital. When they pulled Dad out of the tank, they were unable to revive him. He had drowned. Dad was a quiet man who seldom preached, but he used to say, “Just do the right thing.” He died doing just that.

Amazingly, Joseph survived and has assisted my mom on the farm to this day. Dad’s viewing lasted more than five hours, and nearly two thousand people attended the funeral. Throughout the pain, I have found comfort in Our Lord’s words: “No greater love hath a man, than to lay down his life for his friends.”

Another consolation is that the Diocese of Arlington, Virginia, is now considering opening Dad’s cause for canonization. Since Dad’s death, prayer favors have been attributed to his intercession. Babies at death’s doorstep have recovered after their parents asked for Dad’s help. A priest with internal issues was healed after attending Dad’s funeral. A dying man who had obstinately refused the Last Rites changed his mind after a priest prayed for Dad's intercession.

Saint stories often involve men and women who took religious vows, led extraordinary lives, and lived centuries ago, making sainthood seem daunting or unrelatable. I believe my dad’s story is powerful because he was a simple man who lived an ordinary life. He was a farmer, soldier, pilot, coach, husband, and father. Dedicating his life to daily duty, and “doing the right thing,” prepared my dad for the ultimate sacrifice.

I hope and pray the story of his life and death inspires everyone who hears it to pursue holiness in their daily lives.

Chris Vander Woude is a board member of the Tom Vander Woude Guild. To learn more about the process or to share memories of Tom or prayer favors, visit www.tvwguild.org